Smart Political Email

I’m not that involved with political groups, but email makes it easier to participate (or at least stay informed) in small ways. So I’m on a few mailing lists, and once in a while I might participate in a poll or send an e-letter to my congressional representative.

Karl Rove

Image via Wikipedia

Today I got one of the funniest, most eye-catching bulk emails ever:

Dear MoveOn member,

Time to relax!

Obama is way ahead in the polls. It’s time for you to take victory for granted, and to stop paying attention.

And take it from me, Karl Rove: there’s definitely no need to spend one more minute making calls to recruit Obama volunteers.

You’re probably thinking, “But Karl, why would you—the mastermind behind the stealth get-out-the-vote program that powered George Bush’s victories—be advising us not to make phone calls for Obama?”

That’s a good question. (And by the way, I prefer “Evil Genius” to “Mastermind.”) It’s true that voter outreach can tip an election. But hey, Obama’s ahead in the polls, and they never lie.

So relax! Do some yoga. Check out the new season of Project Runway. Sip white wine lattes, or whatever it is that you people like to drink.

Barack does not need folks in Pocatello calling MoveOn members in battleground states to get them out for Obama. So there’s finally time to tie-dye the seat covers for your Volvo. In fact, you probably shouldn’t even bother to vote.

Please forward this to all of your Democrat friends. Don’t send it to Republicans, though.

Thanks in advance for not doing all that you normally do,

–”Karl Rove”

P.S. Again—no volunteering! Don’t click this link to make a few minutes of calls right now, from home, and give a big boost the Obama campaign!

P.P.S. Okay, okay. This is Adam Ruben writing now, from Our lawyers made us promise to tell you that Karl Rove didn’t actually write this message—but we’re pretty sure this is what he’d write if he had.

Want to support our work? We’re entirely funded by our 4.2 million members—no corporate contributions, no big checks from CEOs. And our tiny staff ensures that small contributions go a long way. Chip in here.

Most of the time I don’t read these emails, as I’m not interested in hosting voter-inspiration parties or making lots of phone calls to drum up support for candidates. But this time, I read the whole thing.

Now, where can I get some tie-dye seat covers? (And a Volvo to go with them?)

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Filed under Politics, Silliness and Mayhem

9 responses to “Smart Political Email

  1. Ha! Thanks for this! I think I’ll post this one!

  2. I’ve never tried a white wine latte…I wonder if that would be good? 😉

  3. LOL, I love that! Now..time to make some calls .
    I love tickin’ Rove off while he listens in to my phone calls
    and reads my e-mails. 😉

  4. Nana

    will you be sending us something about the voter registration fraud being committed by ACORN? 2000 registration forms for Democrats all signed, oops, forged by the same individual, and that, as they say, is only the tip of the iceberg.

  5. runninL8: You’re welcome!

    Dawn: I don’t think so.

    Kate in NJ: Welcome!

    Nana: No, because I have no information about that.

  6. Eve

    OK, now I’m laughing. First, about the white wine lattes! Yewwww.

    Second, about Nana’s note and your response.

    Ah hee hee hee. It kind of sounds like a political denial along the lines of “I had no prior knowledge of that,” or … ;o)

  7. Eve: Really, I don’t know anything about what Nana brought up! And it’s not convenient lack of recall, either 🙂

    And I’m not obligated to show both sides, am I? It’s my little world here. (Really, I just got this bulk email and thought it was funny and therefore a smart way to get people’s attention. Not sharing this as a political statement at all.)

  8. Nana

    Well, Henitsirk, as you are brilliant, I would expect you to explore what is happening on both sides of the political fence. You could Google The Wall Street Journal.

    There has been a lot in the news for about the last 2 weeks about the practices of the ACORN group in getting Democrats registered. This would be a noble endeavor indeed were it not for the fact that there nefarious acts have been confirmed by election officials in various States. There was one official who actually witnessed an ACORN representative completing dozens of registration forms. This kind blatant disregard for the Constitution undermines my vote and yours and those of all honest Americans.

    And I’ll just add this to dispel any doubts out there in blogland: my parents were absolute Democrats; my husband is so far to the right, there’s no room for anyone else; and I am a true Independent, or as they gallingly call me in California, “Decline To State”. I have never voted along strict party lines, but have wisely chosen to vote for those I believe to be the best ones for the job. So there! 🙂

  9. I’m laughing too, although I’m not sure why… Who’s Karl Rove?!?!?!

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